In Tantra or Sacred Sexuality, the Lingam is respectfully viewed and honored, as a "Wand of Light" that channels creative energy and pleasure. It will activate the sexual energy of a man by careful, sensual and energizing contacts. Orgasm is not the goal of the Lingam massage although it can be a pleasent and welcome side effect. The goal is to massage the Lingam, also including testicles, perineum and sacred spot (prostate) externally, allowing the man to surrender to a form of pleasure he may not be accustomed to. From this perspective both receiver and giver relax into the massage.
Men need to learn to relax and receive.
Traditional sexual conditioning has the man in a doing and goal oriented made. The Lingam Massage allows the man to experience his softer, more receptive side and experience pleasure from a non-traditional perspective.